Thursday, July 31, 2008
Huge ball to the face
This kid takes a shot from a huge soccer ball to the face which sends him flying. — The kid die a few minutes later.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Putting Things in Perspective
A father passing by his son’s bedroom, was astonished to see the bed
was nicely made, and that everything was picked up and tidy.
Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed,
‘Dad.’
With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the
letter, with trembling hands.
Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing to you. I had to
elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with
Mum and you.
I’ve been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I
knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings’,
tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much
older than I am.
But it’s not only the passion, Dad. She’s pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn’t, really
hurt anyone. We’ll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with
the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and
ecstasy we want.
In the meantime, we’ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so
Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!
Don’t worry Dad, I’m 15, and I know how to take care of myself.
Someday, I’m sure we’ll be back to visit, so you can get to know
your many grandchildren.
Love, your son, Joshua.
P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I’m over at Jason’s house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in
life than the School report that’s on the kitchen table.
was nicely made, and that everything was picked up and tidy.
Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed,
‘Dad.’
With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the
letter, with trembling hands.
Dear Dad,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing to you. I had to
elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with
Mum and you.
I’ve been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I
knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings’,
tattoos, her tight Motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much
older than I am.
But it’s not only the passion, Dad. She’s pregnant.
Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a trailer in the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children.
Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn’t, really
hurt anyone. We’ll be growing it for ourselves, and trading it with
the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine and
ecstasy we want.
In the meantime, we’ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS, so
Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!
Don’t worry Dad, I’m 15, and I know how to take care of myself.
Someday, I’m sure we’ll be back to visit, so you can get to know
your many grandchildren.
Love, your son, Joshua.
P.S. Dad, none of the above is true. I’m over at Jason’s house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in
life than the School report that’s on the kitchen table.
Monday, July 21, 2008
Racist gets owned!
This scene took place on a British Airways flight between Johannesburg, South Africa & London.
This is a true story.
A White woman, about 50 years old, was seated next to a Black man. Obviously disturbed by this, she called the air Hostess.
“Madam, what is the matter?” - the Hostess asked.
“You obviously do not see it then?” - she responded, - “You placed me next to a Black man. I do not agree to sit next to someone from such a repugnant group. Give me an alternative seat!.”
“Be calm please, ” - The Hostess replied. - “Almost all the places on this flight are taken. I will go to see if another seat is available.”
The Hostess went away and then came back a few minutes later.
“Madam, just as I thought, there are no other available seats in the Economy class. I spoke to the Captain and he informed me that there is also no seats in the Business class. All the same, we still have one seat in the First class.”
Before the woman could say anything, the Hostess continued:
“It is not usual for our company to permit someone from the Economy class to sit in the First class. However, given the circumstances, the Captain feels that it would be scandalous to make someone sit next to someone so disgusting.”
She turned to the Black guy, and said:
“Therefore, Sir, if you would like to, please collect your hand luggage, a seat awaits you in First class.”
At that moment, the other passengers who were shocked by what they had just witnessed stood up and applauded.
This is a true story.
A White woman, about 50 years old, was seated next to a Black man. Obviously disturbed by this, she called the air Hostess.
“Madam, what is the matter?” - the Hostess asked.
“You obviously do not see it then?” - she responded, - “You placed me next to a Black man. I do not agree to sit next to someone from such a repugnant group. Give me an alternative seat!.”
“Be calm please, ” - The Hostess replied. - “Almost all the places on this flight are taken. I will go to see if another seat is available.”
The Hostess went away and then came back a few minutes later.
“Madam, just as I thought, there are no other available seats in the Economy class. I spoke to the Captain and he informed me that there is also no seats in the Business class. All the same, we still have one seat in the First class.”
Before the woman could say anything, the Hostess continued:
“It is not usual for our company to permit someone from the Economy class to sit in the First class. However, given the circumstances, the Captain feels that it would be scandalous to make someone sit next to someone so disgusting.”
She turned to the Black guy, and said:
“Therefore, Sir, if you would like to, please collect your hand luggage, a seat awaits you in First class.”
At that moment, the other passengers who were shocked by what they had just witnessed stood up and applauded.
Dangers of heavy drinking
I just read an article about the dangers of heavy drinking… Scared the daylights out of me.
So that’s it!
After today, no more reading.
So that’s it!
After today, no more reading.
Embarrassed
A very shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage he finally goes over to her and asks, tentatively, “Um, would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?”
She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, “No, I won’t sleep with you tonight!” Everyone in the bar turn and stares at them.
Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.
After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I’m a graduate student in psychology and I’m studying how people respond to embarrassing situations.”
To which, he responds at the top of his lungs, “What do you mean, $200?”
She responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs, “No, I won’t sleep with you tonight!” Everyone in the bar turn and stares at them.
Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table.
After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says, “I’m sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I’m a graduate student in psychology and I’m studying how people respond to embarrassing situations.”
To which, he responds at the top of his lungs, “What do you mean, $200?”
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
Mickey's forest
In 1992 it was announced by Disney that they were to begin reforesting parts of Florida in an effort to give something back to the area. The furthest they got was to plant Mickey’s Forest (above), a collection of 50,000 pine trees shaped in a way that should be familiar to the majority of people reading this. Surprisingly it’s relatively unknown to tourists and locals alike.
More birdseye view of Florida
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